Kim Kardashian Bares Her Big Ass
The entire world has been breathlessly waiting for Kim Kardashian to pose naked in Playboy so we can see her big, round, luscious butt implants close up and personal. Interesting background on this photoshoot: the depth of Kim Kardashian’s massive asscrack necessitated a crew of 6 men to prepare her ass for the shoot;
1. a spreader, with a Jaws of Life to pull her might cheeks apart
2. a hoser, with a 50 gal. drum of Dial® anti-bacterial soap
3. a swabber, with an abrasive scrubber on a 6′ pole
4. a sandblaster, to break down and blast away the dingleballs Kardashian’s mutant asscrack produces
5. a 2nd hoser, to rinse and clear the area
6. a sucker, armed with a suction hose to suck up the toxic brown slurry of sludge produced by the procedure.
Kardashian’s swamp ass attack could kill much in the way a release of chlorine gas or nerve gas if her cheeks were opened without protective clothing and gas-masks. Its theorized her ass miasma could actually burn the skin. Keep that in mind if you do encounter her ass and, for some insane reason, contemplate analingus.
That said, of course we’d hit it like a jack-hammer. Good to see a trend toward thicker nude sluts in Playboy!