Monty Python’s And Now For Something Completely Different
Scene 17: Killer Cats
(Show animated big face talking.)
Head: I would like to apologize for the rather poor taste of the previous item…
(A woman comes up a flashes us.)
Um, excuse me please.
(The face goes after her.)
(Show old woman flagging down buses. They don’t stop. She trips one).
Old Lady: Fleet street please.
(Show a group of people (animated) walking.)
Man: All right everybody, stay close, stay together, don’t lag behind. Come on, keep together everybody. Remember, watch out for the killer cars!
(A man wanders. a car jumps on him.)
Caption-the killer cars
Voice Over: Yes, the killer cars. For years the city had been plagued by ever increasing pedestrian congestion. In an attempt to eliminate this problem, certain fanatical cars had taken the law into their own hands.
(The cars kill several people.)
But the days of the killer cars were numbered thanks to the miracle of atomic mutation.
(A giant Siamese cat scares away the cars.)
Man: Thank you, thank you! You’ve saved our city!
Voice Over: But at what cost?
(The cat starts to eat the city. Cut to an an animated man in a chair.)
Man in Chair, animated: Just then, as it looked for certain that the city was about to be eaten,the earth trembled, and the sun was blotted out from the sky.
Female Voice Over: Cor! Uh, Cripes!
MIC: Suddenly, swarms of giant bees filled the air…
FVO: Ooh!
MIC: …and three hundred million armored horsemen covered with coats of a thousand different colors…
FVO: Uh!
MIC: …appeared at every street corner attacking the monster cat in a scene of such spectacular proportions that it could never in your life be seen in a low budget film like this.
(sigh)
But! Just as the monster cat was starting to weaken, the earth split apart with a deafening roar and…
(Show the cat is falling down a pipe. It lands in a meat grinder with other animals. The grinder is turned,producing long strands. These strands become hair of Botticelli’s Venus in animated ocean. Her tit is twisted like a knob, changing the beautiful music to dance hall tunes. She starts dancing and falls off her shell into a fish aquarium in a pet shop).