Monty Python’s Meaning of Life
Monty Python’s Meaning of Life album (1983)
album cover and liner notes
written by and starring
GRAHAM CHAPMAN • JOHN CLEESE
TERRY GILLIAM • TERRY JONES
ERIC IDLE • MICHAEL PALIN
directed by TERRY JONES
animations and special sequences by TERRY GILLIAM
produced by JOHN GOLDSTONE
Monty Python’s The Meaning of Life is the third and final soundtrack album by Monty Python, released in 1983 alongside their last film. Billed as “The only soundtrack album to be introduced by live fish! (apart from some copies of ‘Shane’)”, it consists of sketches and songs from the film, with a few links performed by Michael Palin and a brief appearance from Terry Gilliam.
The album features dialogue which didn’t make it into the final cut of the film as well as additional sound effects to help with the audio medium. “The Adventures of Martin Luther” sequence is introduced but does not appear. The sketch itself was excised from the final cut of the film but was eventually reinstated 20 years later for the DVD “Director’s Cut”, although it did feature in the illustrated script book which accompanied the film’s release. The film’s songs are included in full, with “Christmas In Heaven” having a longer fade-out than appears in the film.
The original UK vinyl release had the traditional George Peckham messages etched on the runout grooves. The first side read: “GADZOOKS!!! NO TIME LEFT. TURN OVER FOR “THE MEANING OF LIFE” NOW. ALL WILL BE REVEALED”, with the second reading “NO FISH ADDITIVES USED WHATSOEVER, SEE COVER FOR FURTHER DETAILS OF PHILOSOPHY LPS”. The back cover did indeed contain a short list of spoof philosophy LPs, alongside a similarly comic profile of the Python team members.
In the UK the album was accompanied by a 7″ single (A 3495) on 27 June 1983 comprising Galaxy Song/Every Sperm Is Sacred, the latter song containing an extra instrumental section not featured in the film or album version. This was also available as a fish bowl-shaped picture disc.
The 2006 Special Edition includes bonus tracks which included demos, unused song ideas and radio promos.
SIDE ONE
- 01 Introduction Intro
- 02 Fish Introduction Fish 1
- 03 Meaning of Life Meaning
- 04 Miracle of Birth Miracle
- 05 Birth Link/Frying Eggs Eggs
- 06 Every Sperm is Sacred Sperm
- 07 Protestant Condoms Protestant
- 08 Adventures of Martin Luther Martin Luther
- 09 Growth and Learning Growth
- 10 Fighting Each Other Fight
- 11 Great Tea of 1914-18 Tea
SIDE TWO
BONUS TRACKS
SIDE ONE
01 Introduction :15 Intro
Michael Palin Congratulations, record buyer! You are now the proud owner of the first soundtrack album ever to be introduced by live fish! Apart from some copies of Shane…in South America.
02 Fish Introduction :25 Fish 1
From Monty Python’s Meaning of Life Scene 1
03 Meaning of Life 2:08 Meaning
From Monty Python’s Meaning of Life Scene 2
04 Miracle of Birth 3:23 Miracle
From Monty Python’s Meaning of Life Scene 4
05 Birth Link/Frying Eggs :31 Eggs
Michael Palin: Somewhere in the world, a baby is born every 1.7 seconds. This means, that in the time it takes to fry an egg in a conventional frying pan, over 137 babies have been born. Unless you like your egg really crispy and golden brown on the outside like I do, in which case you could have over 200 really crispy, fried babies. Or, if you’re cooking on gas, about 194.
But of course the real problem, is that by far the great majority of these fried eggs are born in areas least able to support them.
06 Every Sperm is Sacred 6:25 Sperm
From Monty Python’s Meaning of Life Scene 4
07 Protestant Condoms 2:22 Protestant
Michael Palin But the tragic events of No. 42 did not go unobserved by the neighbors.
Radio This is the BBC home service. Here is the news: The British invasion of Russia ended quietly yesterday with the unconditional surrender of Moscow to Lieutenant Simon Pring. In Dusseldorf, the British au pair Nanet and Napoleon Hardcastle have won everything they possibly could have entered for. And British weather has been named by Climate Magazine as the best in the world.
Continues with Monty Python’s Meaning of Life Scene 4
08 Adventures of Martin Luther :15 Martin Luther
Michael Palin The Adventures of Martin Luther! An exciting and controversial examination of the protestant reformer whose re- of the role of the individual in Christian belief skook the foundations of a post-feudal Germany in the grip of the sixteenth cent-
09 Growth and Learning 4:27 Growth
From Monty Python’s Meaning of Life Scene 6
10 Fighting Each Other 3:13 Fight
From Monty Python’s Meaning of Life Scene 7
11 Great Tea of 1914-18 :40 Tea
Michael Palin So tea was taken in the heart of France. The dying rays of the summer sun drimted on fresh sliced cucumber sandwhiches and caught the rought textured richness of the Garibori biscuits. The sound of crackling brandy snaps filled the still air. The soldiers chattled over their Swiss roll and spread thick butter upon their scones. Squatties passed the milk to … and Colonel offered apricot jam to their batman, generals and runners sat down to crumpet together. The Great Tea of 1914-1918 had begun.
SIDE TWO
12 Terry Gilliam’s Intro :26 Gilliam
Terry Gilliam Hello, this is Terry Gilliam welcoming you to side two. Of course you won’t be seeing my animations on this, being a record. My normal contributions is of course mainly visual, and one of the things I’m most proud and to happy of have contributed to the film is opening sequence about Pirate clerk. Now, this began years ago when I was really quite a young man, about 45-46, ah, I remembered coming home from a …
13 Accountancy Shanty 1:00 Accountancy
From Terry Gilliam’s Crimson Personal Assurance
14 Zulu Wars 3:17 Zulu
Michael Palin So the intepid warrior accountance cruised away into the sunset, keeping alive the highest ideals of British courage and dedication. Ideals tested many times before, on even fircer battlefields. The Zulu wars 1888.
Continues with Monty Python’s Meaning of Life Scene 7
Michael Palin All that day and much of the next night, the search party pursued their quest for Perkin’s missing leg. Deeper and deeper into the jungle they went, waiting with incredible patience for their servants to cut down the huge trees and savagingly twisted arners. They found the legs of many creatures, including a matching pair belonging to a Swiss missionary and a almost hairless left leg, identifiable only by a faded Victory Brand socks suspender. The next morning found them with fifteen legs, only one of them British, and none the same colour as Perkin’s. Worse still, they were entering the darkest, densest part of the whole soundtrack album, legendary middle of side two, blowing panic written on it. They beagn to hallucinate, dreaming in their wildest moments they were Henry Kissinger’s uncle and aunty.
15 Philosophers 3:01 Philosophers
From Monty Python’s Meaning of Life Scene 10
Woman (Eric Idle) Live organ transplants? What’s that?
Waiter (John Cleese) Well, that’s, uh…kind of a link.
16 Live Organ Transplants 3:11 Live
From Monty Python’s Meaning of Life Scene 11
17 Galaxy Song 2:46 Galaxy
From Monty Python’s Meaning of Life Scene 11
18 Not Noel Coward (Penis) Song :53 Noel
From Monty Python’s Meaning of Life Scene 12
19 Mr. Creosote 3:35 Creosote
From Monty Python’s Meaning of Life Scene 12
20 Death 4:24 Grim
From Monty Python’s Meaning of Life Scene 12
Michael Palin So death took them down the last road. The final journey from which there is no return, when the meaning of life itself would finally be revealed.
Reaper (John Cleese) Behold Paradise!
22 Christmas in Heaven 2:38 Christmas in Heaven
FromMonty Python’s Meaning of Life Scene 12
23 Fish Dedication 1:11 Fish 3
Michael Palin This album is dedicated to fish the world over. In seas, on plates, in ponds, restaurants, kitchens or aquariums, shelves or buckets. In lakes and streams and freezers, to all those silent unsung fish who have given their lives of countless centuries so that other, bigger fish may live. In the hope of this album, we promote a new spirit of harmony and understanding, in the oceans of the world, every dollar or pound or peso or don spent on the purchase of this record will go towards helping fish and all who love them.
Thank you.
Fish That was terrific!
Michael Palin I’ve been asked to add that none of the money will go to piranhas or hammerhead sharks or their relatives…or sea urchins…or those rather strange, flat things with huge, illuminous eyes, but you only found those about 40,000 feet down.
BONUS TRACKS
24 Alt Intro 1 2:38 Intro1
Terry Jones (singing)
It’s the Meaning of Life
The first time there’s been
An explanation of it all
On the cinema screen
It’s the Meaning of Life
A film by the Mon
Ty Python team
It’s the Meaning of Life
As I said previously
That’s the name of the film
That you’ve come here to see
At the cinema today
Or watching at home
On a pirated tape
It’s the Meaning of Life
As I mentioned before
And I hope that you won’t find
This film a bore
Cuz it’s certainly got
A title that leads one
To expect rather a lot
It’s the Meaning of Life
And I hope for your sake
That you’ve come to the right film
And haven’t made a mistake
Because it’s easily done
Especially now-a-days
With these multiple screens
It’s the Meaning of Life
And I’m afraid if it’s not
What you wanted to see
That there isn’t a lot
That I can do now
Because money can’t be refunded
Once the program’s begun
I’d soon go broke if I did
Start doing that especially
As it’s a very bad time right now
In the whole film industry
So if you’re in the wrong place
Just try and make the best of it
Even if this isn’t your type of film
It’s the Meaning of Life
But I just can’t go on
Just endlesslly repeating
It’s the Meaning of Life
And we hope that you stay
To watch the whole thing
It’s the Meaning of Life
25 Alt Intro 2 3:35 Intro2
Terry Jones (singing)
It’s the Meaning of Life
That’s the name of the game
After watching this film
Will we all be the same?
Or will it change our lives
This film that’s called
The Meaning of Life
It’s the Meaning of Life
The first time there’s been
An explanation of it all
On the cinema screen
It’s the Meaning of Life
A film by the Mon
Ty Python team
Called the Meaning of Life
Made simple and clear
Ninety minutes of enlightenment
For all of us here
It’s the Meaning of Life
And we hope that you stay
To watch the whole film
It’s the Meaning of Life
As I said previously
That’s the name of the film
That you’ve come here to see
At the cinema today
Or watching at home
On a pirated tape
It’s the Meaning of Life
And I hope for your sake
That you’ve come to the right film
And haven’t made a mistake
Because it’s easily done
Especially now-a-days
With these multiple screens
It’s the Meaning of Life
And I’m afraid if it’s not
What you wanted to see
That there isn’t a lot
That I can do now
Because money can’t be refunded
Once the program’s begun
I’d soon go broke if I did
Start doing that especially
As it’s a very bad time right now
With the whole film industry
So if you’re in the wrong place
Just try and make the best of it
Even if this isn’t your type of tilm
It’s the Meaning of Life
As I mentioned before
And I hope that you won’t find
This film a bore
Cuz it’s certainly got
A title that leads one
To expect rather a lot
It’s the Meaning of Life
But I just can’t go on
Just endlesslly repeating
The words of this song
We’ve made the point by now
It’s the Meaning of Life
It’s the name of hte film
And we hope you’ll agree
That’s the name of the film
That you came here to see
A film by the Mon
Ty Python team
It’s the Meaning of Life
26 Fat Song :29 Fat Song
Singer (broad German accent)
I love my butt
My butt loves me
When we’re together
We’re as big as three
We go out walking
We bump and beep
We shake and jiggle
And then we leave
27 Christmas in Heaven 2 5:30 Christmas 2
Singer (Mel Torme type singer)
It’s Christmas in Heaven.
All the children sing.
It’s Christmas in Heaven.
Hark. Hark. Those church bells ring.
It’s Christmas in Heaven.
The snow falls from the sky,
But it’s nice and warm, and everyone
Looks smart and wears a tie.
It’s Christmas in Heaven.
There’s great films on TV:
‘The Sound of Music’ twice an hour
And ‘Jaws’ One, Two, and Three.
Celebrity squares has Brando on
The game-show’s Arthur Moore
And all the clips on DisneyTime
Have never been seen before
It’s Christmas in Heaven
And you can drink all day
If it’s your time of the month girl
It’ll go away
You don’t spend a penny
Cause this is heaven here
Though you can still get huge discounts
Of spirits wines and beer
There’s gifts for all the family.
There’s toiletries and trains.
There’s Sony Walkman Fishphone sets
And the latest video games.
It’s Fishmas in Heaven!
You are home with God,
And lots of dace and carp and bream
And halibut and cod!
So all good things to everyone
That’s all we have to say
Cause there are fish in Heaven
And … it’s Fishmas … every … day!
It’s Fishmas in Heaven (Fishmas in Heaven)
It’s Fishmas every day (Hip Hip Hooray)
It’s Fishmas in Heaven
It’s Fishmas every day
It’s Fishmas in Heaven!
You are home with God,
And lots of dace and carp and bream
And halibut and cod!
It’s Fishmas in Heaven (That old Fishmas in Heaven)
Hip hip hip hooray (Hip hip hip hooray)
It’s Fishmas in Heaven
It’s Fishmas every day
So all good things to everyone
That’s all we have to say
Cause there are fish in Heaven
And … it’s Fishmas … every … day!
It’s Fishmas in Heaven (Fishmas in Heaven)
It’s Fishmas every day (Hip Hip Hooray)
It’s Fishmas in Heaven
It’s Fishmas every day
It’s Fishmas in Heaven
Hip hip hip hooray
It’s Fishmas in Heaven
It’s Fishmas every day
It’s Fishmas in Heaven
Hip hip hip hooray (Hip hip hip hooray)
It’s Fishmas in Heaven
It’s Fishmas every day
It’s Fishmas in Heaven!
And we are home with God,
It’s Fishmas in Heaven
And halibut and cod!
It’s Fishmas in Heaven
Hip hip hip hooray (Hip hip hip hooray)
It’s Fishmas in Heaven
It’s Fishmas every day (Fishmas every day)
(It’s Fishmas in Heaven)
It’s Fishmas every day
It’s Fishmas every day
Ooby Dooby Ay
Sardines halibut and bream
It’s Fishmas in Heaven
Hip hip hip hooray (oh it’s Fishmas in Heaven)
It’s Fishmas in Heaven
It’s Fishmas every day
Lots of dace, carp and bream (It’s Fishmas in Heaven)
Halibut and cod (Hip hip hip hooray)
So all good things to everyone (It’s Fishtmas in Heaven)
That’s all we have to say
It’s Fishmas in Heaven (oh it’s Fishmas in Heaven)
Hip hip hip hooray (Hip hip hip hip hooray)
It’s Fishmas in Heaven
It’s Fishmas every day
Fish films on TV
Just for me
Fish fish fish fish
Just for you and me
28 Greasy Hair :41 Greasy Hair
Michael PalinThe Meaning of Life is a brand new aftershave from Monty Python…
Engineer Film, it’s a film Mr. Squires.
Michael Palin Ah no I’m sorry I must have the two, two scripts mixed
Engineer Will you please, we’ve only got 30 seconds.
Michael Palin The Meaning of Life is a brand new film from Monty Python. It’s minty, crispy, completely…
Engineer Just brilliant, provocative…
Michael Palin Test drive one for yourself.
John Cleese (in broad Italian accent) Monty Python’s Meaning of life from June the 23rd at the Plaza 1, the Embassy Fullham Road and the Embassy Bosport
The Meaning of Life for slightly greasy hair.
Squeaky voice weetee eeteen
29 Dino Viccoti 1:00 Dino
Michael Palin (broad Cockney accent) Hello, this is Dino Viccotti. I was sitting at home the other day watching the ripped off pirate video of the brand new George Lucas film, not Return of the Jedi, he hasn’t even made that one yet, but my friend Bonzo down at the goer dropped me a copy, Sink the Jedi, and ah, someone rang me up wanting me to have a few words with people, about Monty Python’s The Meaning of Life and going to it and all that.
Well, fink it’s imcumbent on you all get down there, go and see it, otherwise could be a little bit of trouble. Come home find your car not in the place you thought it was, not so many wheels around the base of it, that sort of thing.
So if you sort of value uh, life and things, property and things like that- oh you know I’m not saying anything, I’m not coming at you or anything like that, you want to have all your teeth when you leave, we all do, it’s natural, really. So, well go and see The Meaning of Life and keep your teeth in your face.
30 Stretch the Script :32 Stretch
John Cleese Go and see The Meaning of Life
Engineer We had to check it out, say it again.
John Cleese Go and Mean, uh sorry, go and see The Meaning of Life by Monty Python
Engineer That’s good, I liked (mumbling)
John Cleese Go and see The Month, sorry.
Engineer That’s fine love, could we go to him next?
31 Grand Prix :31 Grand
Michael Palin Go and see The Meaning of Life
Dobbin No I don want to, are you canvassing for the alliance?
Michael Palin Does the Grand Prix du Jury at Cannes mean anything to you at all?
Dobbin ‘ho?
Michael Palin The Grand Prix du Jury, a medal won by this film.
Dobbin No, I don’t want to see it.
Michael Palin All right if you’re going to be like that, go see Marnie, see if I care.
Dobbin Uh, no because I don’t like Tippi ‘eedron cuz she come to our tea once, and she was very rude to my mother.
Michael Palin Well if none of the Pythons promise to come to tea with your mother will you come see the film?
Dobbin Yeah alright huhuhuhuhuhuh (goofy laugh)
Michael Palin Thank you very much indeed, thank you.
32 Hard of Thinking :50 Hard
Dobbin 1 (Terry Jones) And now a commercial for Monty Python’s Meaning of Life for the Hard of Thinking.
Dobbin 2 (Michael Palin) Yeah, that’s just us innit?
Dobbin 1 Yeah um uh
Dobbin 2 Can you put it in words?
Dobbin 1 What?
Dobbin 2 Can you put it in words?
Dobbin 1 What? Put what in words, in words?
Dobbin 2 Uh, I’ve forgotten.
Dobbin 1 Well uh, the thing is… uh..
Dobbin 2 Yeah, Is, is, We have to say…
Dobbin 1 We have to say, say about it…
Dobbin 2 We have to say…
Dobbin 1 Go and see it
Dobbin 2 That’s it, go and see it
Dobbin 1 Just say please…
Dobbin 2 I think we just have to say it, I was told we just have to say it.
Dobbin 1 Oh, oh yeah.
Dobbin 2 That’s a tricky one cuz I
Dobbin 1 Well you know you meet anyone…and you think they’re a bit empty
Dobbin 2 You suddenly realize…
Dobbin 1 There must be a bit more to it…
Dobbin 2 Just now, I can’t think of anything to say about it…